We were up early. Anticipation I guess you'd call it. Or eager junkies. Whatever it was we were calling for a ride at 7:30 am. Andy was sick. Not to bad yet but still noticeable. We caught a ride from the same guy that I'd met the night Andy and I first met at the In-n-Out. An Asian guy who thought heroin was fun from time to time. He never used needles and always overpaid so Andy could get a fix for hooking him up. We met Andy's dealer at about 9am, all got high an headed to the storage unit where the buyer for the stamps said he kept his gear for his business. On the way Kenny, the Asian guy, took us by Raising Cain's. It was the best meal I'd had in a few days.
We arrived promptly at 10am. The buyer was already in the parking lot and called Andy just as I stepped out of the truck. I introduced myself as Andy was pulling the rolls out of his backpack. The buyer looked them over and pulled out a rubber banded wad of 20's and 100's.
"Thanks guys. It's all there. Give me a call if you get any more." The buyer said
As Andy counted the money I thanked the man and let him know we would be in touch.
It wasn't 30 seconds and we were back in the truck and Andy was shelling out my share of the $1,600 with one hand and on the phone with the dealer with the other.
"Where are you? Yeah I got it. I need a lot. K I'll be there." Andy hung up the phone and we headed to the hotel.
We had decided to spend $400 initially on drugs and $220 on a week at The Blue Angel, a seedy little rathole of a hotel Andy knew about on east Fremont st in the other side of town. We sped over to the hotel and had Kenny check us in as neither Andy or myself had ID. Andy called back to tell the driver what room we were in. He was there in ten minutes.
Pete wasn't the kind of guy you envision when you think of a drug delivery guy. About 6' 350 pounds 45 years old with a wheeze in his breath and a heavy New York accent with stains on his stretched out pocketed tee and elastic gym shorts.
Pete came and left in a matter of seconds and there we were with a hotel room, almost $1000 cash and $400 worth of heroin and cocaine. There was silence for bout 2 minutes before an all out binge was underway. I was quickly erasing my lack of habit. We shot speedballs nonstop for hours. At about 7:45pm, Just before the dealers closing time, we were almost out of drugs and decided to call back for another restock for the night.
Pete was back at the room about 8:30pm as his last stop for the day and sold us everything he had left, another $320 worth.
The whole time, between shooting up and throwing up, Andy and I continued to share stories and BS about our lives. It's strange how doing drugs with someone can make you the best of friends. In that moment that person is not only someone you can confide in, but someone who is perfectly fine seeing you for what you are. I took happiness in that which for an addict, as I have learned, is a horrible and false sense of security.
I woke up at about 10am to Andy cooking up a wake up shot and handing me my rig. I set it on the counter and headed across the street to McDonald's to grab us breakfast. This was my first time on foot on east Fremont. In about 100 yards getting to the crosswalk to get to McDonald's I was asked for money, cigarettes and if I had a phone. This was the moment I realized where I was. The depths of poverty, addiction and crime were thick here. Was this where I chose to be? The place where I thought I'd turn things around for my life? I came back from McDonald's and did my shot. Maybe just to get high. Maybe to forget about the thoughts the geography outside had stuck in my head.
The next few days were more of the same. The night before we were to check out we inventoried our funding. $160 combined. We had done almost $1,200 worth of drugs between the 2 if us in one week. Deep down I was worried. Andy was too. He did not say it but I could tell. We Had nowhere to go. Nowhere to stay and at our current rate we'd be out if money by the end of the following day.
We decided to have Andy's mom pick us up and take us to his parents house so we could get some sleeping bags as we had no idea where we would be going in the following days. It was pretty unnerving being in the same car as the person we had just robbed a week before. We told Andy's mom we were going to be staying with some friends and she bought it after lecturing Andy about getting his shit together.
We left Andy's parents house on foot later that evening. To save money we decided to camp out in this undeveloped lot outside of Andy's parents neighborhood where we wouldn't be bothered. I remember talking to Andy about how much we both hated panhandling. We hashed over ideas all night about how we were going to make money going forward.
The next few weeks were rough. We had ran out of money and were getting by on money Andy's mom gave him, Kenny hooking us up and a little panhandling here and there though neither of us wanted to commit to that. Was the party over? Had we settled in to being homeless bums?
By this time I had thought about hooking back up with Rook and Becca back on Trop. Would they be mad? Were they even there? I didn't want to abandon Andy. We had become good friends.
Around noon we were waiting for Pete at the In-n-Out. Andy kept saying he was going to go to WestCare, the local free detox program, soon because he couldn't keep up with the grind of hustling money and panhandling. I told him he was full of shit.
Pete showed up and when Andy got back he made a b-line for the In-n-Out bathroom. Before I got inside he had already cooked up our shots. His was really dark whereas mine was much lighter. I called Andy on it.
"Did you cut my shot?" I asked
"What? No dude of course not." Andy said
"Then switch with me." I said
"No dude I promise they are the same." Andy said
He attempted to put the needle in his arm and I grabbed his wrist.
"I'm not stupid dude! Re-mix them. " I ordered
"Okay okay don't be a bitch." Andy muttered and remixed the shots
When I got my rig back I could tell without question that I had assumed correctly. Andy had attempted to give me a shot that was mostly water and take all the dope for himself. Had this been going on all along? Andy did cook most of the shots and at that moment I had realized I didn't usually watch him. He had been watering down my drugs the whole time. I was sure of it. I felt so stupid. This is what my "friend" had thought would be acceptable. That I wouldn't mind or would not notice. After I did my shot I chose my words carefully.
"How many times have you done that to me?" I asked
"Done what? I've never cut your shot man. Never. " Andy said
The next day I caught Andy red handed. Growing straight water into my syringe mixed with very little dope. I didn't say anything but I did decide to get even. By this point Andy's mom was becoming very distant. Hard to get ahold of. Last time they had spoke she had confronted him about the stamps. Asked him how we paid for the motel room and how we had been getting by the last few weeks. Later that day Andy asked me if I would take the blame. He insisted that me admitting I stole them would not only get him back in the good graces with his family. He assured me his parents would not call the police. I was beside myself. I've done plenty of things for friends in my life but with the evidence I had found and Andy watering down my drugs I wasn't feeling like giving him a leg up. That was the moment I figured out how I was gonna get even. I told Andy I'd think about it and tell him in the morning.
The next morning I got up early and slipped Andy's phone out of his backpack, got his moms number out of his contacts and removed the cell phone battery and tossed it in a cup of water. I grabbed my stuff and slid away to the casino to make a call.
Andy's mom answered and I told her I had something very important to tell her and than I needed to see her right away.
She arrived in minutes. Maybe she tried to call Andy's phone and it went straight to voicemail so she got worried.
I told her everything just as it went down. How we waited till they were gone, how I waited as lookout on the side of the house and, most important of all for me, how Andy stole the stamps.
She was shocked. I could see the mix of emotions on her face.
"I thank you for telling me Chris but why are you telling me this."
"Can you take me to WestCare?" I asked
If you would like to contribute to my efforts at stopping addiction please visit:
Together we can make a difference.
No comments:
Post a Comment